Bring on the Long, Blank Summer

Today is the first day of my summer vacation. *sigh* I couldn't be happier about graduating from high school, but I'm a little irked at the thought of no longer being able to procrastinate writing because of schoolwork. I have a job, so I won't be doing nothing besides writing, but I'm not used to having no paper, test, or project in the back of my mind. It's scary to be only responsible for my book. 

A week ago, I was giddily "in the groove." I wrote a page a day and enjoyed it. Now I've slowed down a little, probably because I'm immobilized by my fear of losing that momentum, an obnoxious self-fulfilling prophecy. But I realized my mistake: I was focusing on product, rather than process. I'm sure everyone has had this problem, but it always takes me a while to realize I've fallen into this trap yet again. Fear works in the dark, and you only realize it's there after it's done you damage.

So I guess this isn't an incredibly original post, but I thought I'd get this blog started up again. (And your excuses are running out. School is over. For most, anyway.) Here is this post, tidily summed-up, straight from my bulletin board: "You must not intend to create something worthwhile. You must intend to play with blank space."